I must've been cursed by some mean old gypsy or something because I bought a jar of salsa almost two weeks ago that I still cannot open. I'm no momma's boy; I can open the hell out of just about any jar. But this one just isn't happening, even though my hands are as strong as a robot's. I've tried everything at my disposal and now my efforts have devolved to just me hitting the jar with a hammer and seeing what happens.
It's times like this where I wish I wasn't a moron when it came to science, because it seems like there'd be a scientific solution to this problem. I have some vague suspicion that hot/cold temperatures causes stuff to expand/contract, but I have no idea how that works. And I'm not going to just try and risk getting either scalding salsa all over myself, or getting Sub Zeroed in the face with it. What about friction? Does friction have anything to do with this? Could I buy a can of Anti-Friction, spray it on the jar, and open that bastard up? Magnets maybe? Could I go to one of the Poles and open this thing up?
I wish this was something I could complain about to the company. I just think if I were to do so, this would come back to bite me on the ass when it comes time to elect teh board members for Salsa Afficionado magazine. It's a shame I told Lou Ferrigno he couldn't be my roommate, because this would probably be a done deal if he were here. If anyone has any ideas, let me know.
Posted by Cody at September 23, 2003 05:44 PMfrito and i are on our way
Posted by: diddy at September 23, 2003 08:43 PMThe experts in a certain border town would know.
Posted by: Matt at September 23, 2003 10:42 PMwith almost everything except water, hot makes things expand and cold makes things contract. the heat causes the molecules to move faster, which increases the distance between them.
try running it under hot water. to avoid burning yourself, place the jar in the sink and run the hot water over it.
then, fill the 3-gallon jug with salsa and then pour it into the 5-gallon jug. fill the 3-gallon jug again and pour what you can (2 gallons) into the 5-gallon jug. now you have 1 gallon in the 3-gallon jug. empty the 5-gallon jug and pour the 1 gallon into it. now, fill the 3-gallon jug and pour its contents into the 5-gallon jug. you now have exactly 4 gallons of salsa!
wait, what was the question?
Posted by: paul at September 24, 2003 09:49 AMSkip this heat nonsense. Just tap the edge of the lid against the ground kinda hard. That can sometimes make the little "bubble" in the lid pop up.
Posted by: Deuce at September 24, 2003 12:50 PMUsing the expert advice of one Paul Fischer and one Deuce Lioi, I opened the crap out of some salsa this afternoon. Thank you gentlemen!
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