Crappy Topical Entry (St. Patrick's Day)

St. Patrick's Day! Woooo! Let's pour some whiskey in our mashed potatoes and pretend we're Irish!

St Paddy's is neat because all of us get to switch teams for a day and go Irish. We need more holidays where we can try on nationalities for a day, and we should start with Jamaica. I don't know why I love Jamaicicana so much (made-up up word for all things Jamaican), but jerk chicken, Red Stripe, and the phrase "Jamaican me crazy!" all play a large parts in it. Isn't that one guy on Futurama from Jamaica? I like him too, and that's pretty much all I need for a holiday. Once we have Jamaicicana Day down, we should do something with Chile. I'm thinking that day would be mostly chasing llamas around a soccer field, but I'm open for suggestions.

If you're really Irish though, today's probably not such a good day because everyone is stealing your thunder. You've probably been drinking green beer all year long, only to see a bunch of weinerbiscuits swoop in and go crazy over it one day a year. You get no credit for being the afficionado. Not only that, but your cheeks are probably going unsmooched as some stinker with a "Kiss Me, I'm Irish" button goes to Smoochie Town. As unfortunate as all of that is, St Patrick's Day does work out well for those of us who aren't from Ireland, but nevertheless happen to sun-burn easily and love booze. I am firmly in favor of more days when those traits are considered assets.

Since I'm devoted to continuing this idiotic entry, I feel obligated to note that this is the only holiday that condones pinching. I don't know how I feel about that. If we're talking some playful pinches, then I am all in. Mean pinching is another thing entirely. You better believe I have some experience in that from the South Arlington Pinch Wars of the late 80s between HoPo and myself. But anyway, since it seems these ethnic holidays get an annoying action associated with them, I will be giving out Wet Willies on Jamaicicana Day. You'll want to wear your rasta hat low on that day.

PS: found a new way to obsess over the Dallas Mavericks. It's a little something called BlogMaverick.com, and it's Mark Cuban going crazy. Eat it up.

Posted by Cody at March 17, 2004 06:13 PM