Western civilization is full of wonders. One example is edible underwear, and another, that I just experienced this weekend, is the booze cruise. For those of you who aren't in the know, a booze cruise is when you board a huge boat and putter around a lake for a few hours, drinking all the while. My first reaction when I heard about it was, "They let you do that?!" (In this case, 'they' refers to the boat owner, crew, various maritime officials, and the President.) It sounds like something only rich, crazy people can pull off. Well friends, I'm not rich and I'm only a little crazy, and guess where I spent Friday evening.
What is it that makes the whole thing so fun? I think it's the boat. Alcohol on dry land is pretty good, but most of the time, you're immobile. On a booze cruise, you're sailing by a bunch of rich people, watching them eat dinner through their dining room windows. It's good, creepy fun. Another interesting part about the boat is that somewhere around you, there's a stash of flare guns and harpoons. They don't let you play around with them, but it's something that stayed in my mind. "What if, just what if, we had the best captain ever? He would probably allow us to shoot at the paddle boats." Just food for thought.
What beverages do I suggest for a booze cruise? Here, I encourage everyone to think like a pirate. Rum is good, because rum is what pirates drink (see various movies, songs, and Long John Silver placemats for reference). Also, I would recommend anything that comes in a single serving bottle because it's a good feeling to stand on a boat, hoist a bottle, and yell something incomprehensible; this may have something to do with pirates also. However, I'd stay away from the fancy drinks. Imagine your boat gets boarded by river bandits or killer manatees. Ideally, you want them to take a look at your drink and know that you mean business; this is why sailors don't drink cosmos and appletinis.
In conclusion, the booze cruise was great. Many thanks to Danza for arranging the whole thing, and to Kristin for arranging a birthday around then. It only magnified my desire to buy a house boat and become a crazy dock person.
Posted by Cody at May 1, 2006 08:12 PM