SXSWified

Dear God, thank you for ending SXSW. I only participated in two days, but they were both loaded with free drinks, preening hipsters, and people distributing porn on 6th Street. I whole-heartedly support all of that, but it wears a man out. Let's break the weekend down.

On Friday afternoon, my legal counsel and I attended the Jane magazine party, as we did last year. As with last year, I don't think we had legitimate invites, even though someone from Jane read my post from the last party and offered to put us on the list. My response: "Thanks but no thanks. When I enter a social event, I do so through the back door, dressed like a caterer."

It wasn't quite that glamorous, but we got in anyway. There was a long list of bands, but I'll single out the highlights: The Comas and Scissors for Lefty. I hadn't heard of either, but they both rocked the house. There was free Miller Lite, Seagrams, and York peppermint patty brownies too. If I'm diagnosed with a horrible illness sometime soon and I want to go out with dignity, I implore someone to whip up a batch of those brownies with some rat poison or something. I would go out with a smile on my face and love in my heart.(In case anyone has to do this for me, see if York will underwrite the death brownies; that's got to be great advertising. Leave out the free booze though, or else I'll go to sleep while watching Raising Arizona as soon as I sit down.)

There were some interesting folks at the party to talk to, and I really hope that guy from Sony takes my suggestions seriously. Play n Sniff CDs will not make themselves, people.

The next day, Saturday, Laura and I gained entry to another fancy party through another act of brazen stupidity. The party was for Nylon, which is apparently another magazine. On the invite, it requested your name and your affiliation. I know it will shock you, but listing CodyPowell.com won't even get me into a crooked bingo parlor. Instead, I made up an affiliation. I said I was the media rep for Black Hole Brewery. Whether that exists or not, I have no idea. I do know that Black Hole Brew was the beer that Coach McGuirk drank on Home Movies, and so I yoinked it in homage. It worked; I will not apologize.

This other party was very, very crowded, and it was a lot harder to get a drink. As a crabby guy who likes his free drinks, that's a clear negative. However, the bands were kicking, and the highlights here were the Fratellis and Malajube. I enjoyed both thoroughly. I will also tip my cap to the bartender, who made bloody mary so hot that I was biting on my knuckles and hollering for Mama halfway through. Crowded, but good, and made all the better through my deceit and malfeasance. In all fairness, I live in this city and feel as if I should be invited to everything.

If you're doing SXSW stuff, I encourage everyone to find a way into the fancy parties. The bands are good, the drinks are free, the brownies are rapturous, and your credentials can be pulled straight from your hindquarters.

Posted by Cody at March 19, 2007 07:57 PM