A Date With Bryant Gumbel

Well friends, we're still stuck as the #2 result for goulash on google. Obviously János Mohácsi and Imre Szeberényi made some sort of deal with Google to get their stupid page on top. If that's the way it's going to be, then that's the way it's going to be; I can bribe with the best of them. So, here's an open offer to the good people at Google: Let me be the #1 result and in return, I will arrange a date for you with Bryant Gumbel. What you and Gumbel do on the date is up to you, but I will arrange a lovely suite at the Ramada for you two to kick it at afterwards. Help yourself to the Hot Pockets and RC Cola in the mini fridge of the room.

I had a large, large time at the Austin City Limits Music Fest this weekend. Almost too large of a time, like an inordinately mammoth time. There's one rule of life I keep bumping up against that I'll just share with all of you now: if you're going to be out in the Texas sun, sweating like a monkey at a track meet, alcohol becomes a dangerous, deadly proposition. It's a fine line between, "Yay, I'm having fun outdoors" and "Oh dear lord, who set my pants on fire?" In this situation, as in all others, I'd recommend going for the horse tranquilizers over alcohol.

Well, no response yet from this dude. Sandile Nogxina, if you happen to be reading this, I was serious. Let's make some money! Luckily, Mr. Lioi has joined me in my fight to anger the scam artists of the third world. Please don't call us heroes.