Joe Bill Pullman

So, Fox is doing Joe Millionaire 2 soon, where they'll trick lots of European ladies into falling for a poor American by telling them that he's rich. They did that last year; why not break some new ground? Here are a few options.

Joe Lactose Intolerant - Women are wooed by a mysterious man who refuses to eat any cheese, claiming he's allergic. In the end, he reveals it was all a ruse and that he really, really likes String Cheese.

Joe Only Male Genitalia - Women are wooed by a mysterious man who cannot stop referring to his genitalia. All he ever talks about is how happy he is with his solitary set of genitals, and how he wouldn't take another set if they were giving them away. In the final episode, he informs the lady that he is in fact a hermaphrodite.

Joe Regular Height - Women are wooed by a mysterious man of regular height. He starts off every date by announcing, "The pants I'm wearing are 32/32 and they fit me just fine." The ladies are intrigued. He finally tells the girl he's chosen that he's actually Hakeen Olajuwon, and was walking on his knees for the whole show.

Joe Human - Women are wooed by a mysterious man who only oinks and walks on all fours, reputed to be a superfamous oil baron. They think he is just being an eccentric rich dude. On the final episode, it is revealed he is not a human but a pig, and is actually only the head of HR for the oil company.

Joe Bill Pullman - Women are wooed by a mysterious quasi-movie star named Bill Pullman. Every date starts out with them watching a movie from his extensive catalog, and then writing a precis on the astounding range of Bill Pullman. In the final episode, he reveals that he is in fact Bill Paxton, not Bill Pullman, and that Bill Pullman is a total weiner.

Posted by Cody at October 14, 2003 6:35 PM