November 18, 2003

Baby G's in da hayouse

Woooo! That's my long sigh of relief after the pressures of the Centennial post. Now I can look forward a lazy, relaxing weekend. WAIT! I just picked up something on my shortwave radio about a goulash centennial party, occuring here in Austin in my garage on Saturday night. Who will be there? Oh, I don't know, ME. And maybe Mr. Henry Kissinger. He's a fan. He's more than a fan; he's a devotee. I seem to remember the following moment at the United Nations some months back.

Henry Kissinger: Mr. Secretary General, I'd like to propose we make a special UN tribunal investigating the awesomeness of Goulash.

Kofi Annan: What the hell is that?

Henry Kissinger: It's this website that's really funny that I read all the time. I keep trying to work up the courage to post in the comments, but I don't want to look lame. It's so awesome, Kofi. I'll send you the link on AIM sometime.

Kofi Annan: Are you even involved with the United Nations?

Henry Kissinger: I don't know, I'm some sort of diplomat.

So there you have it. Undeniable proof that Henry Kissinger may just appear out of the blue for the party on Saturday. Make sure to wear colors that won't offend him.

Speaking of colors that won't offend, I remember in 6th grade, some guys at my elementary school started up this gang. They called themselves the Baby G's, and they wore these little pacifiers around their necks. It was definitely the coolest thing ever. They just sat around the playground and scowled at people. Then, one day, someone offended a member of the Baby G's in a game of pogs or something, so they all jumped this guy at lunch. For the next week, all of us walked on our tiptoes around the Baby G's, lest we start up a rehash of the pog incident. Then I think it was explained to them that a bunch of middle class white kids in the suburbs can't have a gang; they'd have to call it a fraternal organization. From there, it fizzled. My first point: Arlington, TX is weird. My second point: please don't make Henry Kissinger go Baby G's on your ass this weekend. My third point: Anyone want to revive the Baby G's with me?

Posted by Cody at November 18, 2003 5:43 PM