Gay Marriages

In all of the hubbub of the 100th post, I forgot to mention I had posted part 2 of In Search of the Wily Jacott on CarlosJacott.com. Please, no one tell Carlos about this. You have no idea how angry he can get.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: it must be pretty nice to be gay in Massachusetts right now. The sodomites of Massachusetts can now get their marriage on with ruthless abandon. Upon hearing of the ruling, President Bush issued the following statement, "Men kiss each other?!?" and then made lots of fake gagging noises. I had two thoughts when I first saw this story. First, I watch Will and Grace, and none of the gay fellows on there ever talked about getting married, so was this really necessary? Second, I predict that gay marriages will be legalized in Texas the day after a bunch of gay aliens take over the state and kill all of those who oppose them, and not a second before.

I guess the hullabaloo over this story is that some people feel like allowing gay marriages would destroy the sanctity of marriage, something to which all mail order brides cling to. Well, you better just get over it, Huong Tse Jorgensen (that's the best mail order bride name I could come up with). And that goes for all of you polygamists too! We're really going to have to rethink a lot of marriage traditions with this. For instance, before a heterosexual marriage, normally the bridge and groom have separate bachelor and bachelorette parties. In a gay marriage, couldn't you just have one big bachelor party? Wouldn't that lead to problems, like who gets to humps the stripper first? And who gets to dump the body when you accidentally kill him? I don't know what the answer here is, but I think we definitely need to think this one through.

This entry shall be abbreviated as it is stupid, and I have crap to do this evening.