Leap day, suckas! Since I go out of my way to be nice once every four years, I decided I would take advantage of today and help my sister move into her new place. Rather than regale you with a bunch of exciting moving stories, I'll just say that when I was finished and I got back to my apartment, it smelled like someone had been making toast in here. I can't tell if my olfactory functions are hallucinating, or if I'm dealing with a dangerous new breed of super criminal. In the unlikely event someone broke into my apartment just to make toast: there is no need for all the subterfuge, toast maker. I like toast too, and I'll gladly let you in so you can use my toast facilities, provided you share the toast. I am not responsible for what happens to you if I let you in and you don't share.
Since the Oscars are tonight, you may be expecting me to comment on them. Well, let me tell you something, folks. Here at Goulash Junction, I do as a please; if that means writing about toast burglars instead of the Oscars, so be it. If I were to comment on the Oscars though, I'd say that whole awards show is one big baloney sammich. As a matter of fact, that goes for all awards. I decided in the 3rd grade, right after I was named a Wood Elementary Wonder Kid at an assembly, that I had to immediately stop caring about awards because I would only be disappointed from then on. In a sense, I went out on top, like James Dean. Certain award shows still get their due reverence from me (Nickelodeon's Kid Choice Awards), but I really don't care for any others, because I've experienced the glory and I know just how fickle it can be.
Okay, I am having a hard time stringing together coherent sentences, so let's just call this one a mulligan and move on to tomorrow.
Posted by Cody at February 29, 2004 6:23 PM