You'll Get Yours, Borofilios

Short entry today, as I am not a happy man. Here are a few reasons why.

1. I parked under a tree at work today. While I was shaking the money tree indoors, it began raining outside. When I came out for lunch, it looked as if my car had been appropriated by the Swamp Thing. It was easily mistaken for one of those old timey vehicles constructed solely of sod and twigs.

2. When getting money from the ATM in order to wash aforementioned car, I left my card in the machine. Apparently, no one had told Bank of America that the Bride of Swamp Thing waits for nothing, whether it be man or machine.

3. When I returned to the bank an hour later to see if someone had returned my card, the teller told me that my card was either destroyed by the ATM or it was currently being used to finance an Eastern European snuff film. I had a crappy mint on the way out of the place.

4. My office has smelled like ketchup all day long. Not sure what to make of that.

I feel that with today's events, I can confidently conclude that my nemesis, Professor Borofilios, both exists AND is dead set on my destruction. If you see a debonair man with a velvet cape, a diamond scepter, and something that looks like a Death Ray, walking towards my apartment, please hit him with your car. Many thanks.