I don't want to make any rash accusations, but I'm pretty certain that someone has been spiking my food with Nerd Juice. A few pieces of evidence, gathered over the course of the past week.
1. Last week at work, someone was trying to test something (a theory or something), so they told me to pick a number. I picked 8.2. They said, "No, a whole number." I replied haughtily, "Well, you should've specified that you wanted an integer!" It came out of my mouth so quickly, I wasn't even sure I said it. The only confirmation I needed, though, was the mortified look on my colleague's face.
2. During a profound, alcohol-fueled conversation on Saturday night with a group of acquaintances, someone mentioned that the universe was 13 billion years old. I then made out a big deal out of telling him that it was actually 13 POINT 7(!) billion years old, and that if he wanted me to document this fact, I could go home and get my old astronomy book!! I'll be damned if anyone besmirches the age of the universe on my watch.
3. In this entry, I was actually considered asking if anyone here was going to the Austin Dot Net Users Group meeting on Monday. Nevermind that this site is read exclusively by prison inmates and confused Japanese ladies; let's get together for some cream soda and compiler talk after the meeting!
It's not that being a nerd is completely unfamiliar to me. I go through alternating periods of almost-cool and then horrendous nerdiness on a 2 year basis; I've gotten used to periodically demolishing any status I've built up through good taste and pithy remarks with a few unfortunate tirades on graphing calculators and a zeal for the works of Gene Roddenberry. Even though I'm firmly nestled in a nerdy trough right now, I still think there's hope. If I were beyond repair, I would've noted by now that my nerdiness could be graphed across the years as a sinusoidal function. I'm only commenting hypothetically about that though, so I insist that I can be salvaged.
How will I bring myself back from the brink, you may ask. Well, this weekend, I am going to administer some emergency rations of Michelob Ultra and reality TV. That won't get me to almost-cooldom overnight, but it will dispel any notions I have on who'd win a fight between Mace Windu and Worf. It's not going to be pretty, but then it rarely is around my apartment.
Posted by Cody at March 4, 2004 6:10 PM