A Little While Gone

Today, at lunch, I ordered a chicken sandwich. Rather than being served that, I managed to end up with a burger and two tacos. Was that a test, Jack in the Box? If so, I hope the correct response was to peel out of the parking lot, honking my horn and screaming "FREE TACOS!" Each day when lunch rolls around, I can't help but think that it'd really come in handy to have a personal chef. Instead of shovelling down my McNuggets with the rest of the slobs, I could shovel down beef wellington in my underwear in the privacy of my own home. Hmm, I wonder if any culinary geniuses would be willing to price-match the $5 I usually spend on my midday meal. If they did, I'd probably only get a bowl full of gravel and sugar packets.

As I intimated earlier, I won't be doing an update Wednesday or Thursday. I'll be in Galveston, doing the family thing. In addition to doing the family thing, I will also be hitting the dog track, where I'll be doing a little bit of this: *pantomimes the counting of lots of money*. After that, I think I'm going to take a tour of NASA, where I'll be doing a little bit of this: *pantomimes the theft of moonrocks*.

Of course, after I put the dog track out of business with the precise mathematics of my bets, NASA will probably try to get me to work there. Here are my terms, rocket scientists.