Ye Gods, I had a very busy day of work today and so my bag of magic is practically used up. However, it has come to my attention that in the very near future, William Eduardo Lybrand (aka Willly Brand) is making a move from San Antonio to Beverly Hills, CA. I told him, "Man, I know you like Eddie Murphy movies, but there's no reason to base your life on one. I mean, Beverly Hills Coder? That sounds neither plausible nor amusing." His response? "Shut up, and call me Axel." (side note: isn't it strange how many pop culture icons of the 80s where named Axel? Okay, there were only two of them (Rose and Foley), but I bet there are a lot more Marvs in the USA and I don't remember any of them capturing the public's eye. Maybe Beverly Hills Cop III would've been more amusing if the main character had been Marv Foley.)
Anyway, one might think that his departure would crush my spirits, but it's the exact opposite. See, I never liked him much to begin with. Also, if he goes out to the LA-region, I now have a place to stay when I come to try out for Jeopardy. You better think again if you assume I'm joking about that last part. I'm going to try out for Jeopardy, I'm going to get on the show, and I'm going to win. I've always wanted to, and now that I can, I will. You better be glad you lost already, Ken Jennings.
The only thing that's stopped me in the past was the cost of travelling out there. I'd have to pay for a flight, a hotel, and food. However, if Will is stationed out there, I only have to pay for a flight, food, and Will's whores, which should save a pretty penny. (If he thinks I'm buying whores that are fancy enough to offset the cost of a room in Beverly Hills, he also better think again.) I haven't run any of this by him and I am also nearly out of vacation days already this year. Will either of these stop me? No. My destiny is well within my grasp, and grasp it I shall. In only a matter of months, I'll be saying, "What is tetanus, Alex?" to the actual Alex Trebeck, as opposed to the pinata version of him I have in my bathroom. More details to follow.
Posted by Cody at June 7, 2005 6:25 PMIt's looking like my zip code will be 90211, and not 90210. Despite my best efforts, its unfortunately inevitable that I will be in the Beverly Hills ghetto.
Actually, I'm really just avoiding 90210 like the plague. I heard that Shannon Doherty chick is a real bitch.
What's the 90211 equivalent of Ian Ziering? Whatever it is, that's you.
Posted by: Cody at June 7, 2005 9:05 PMI give Willy 6 months before he's spit out the bottom of the porn industry.
Posted by: paddy at June 7, 2005 9:21 PMActually, where do you get spit out of if you enter the porn industry at the bottom? That, the very butt of porn, is where Will gets spit out of, I bet.
Posted by: Cody at June 7, 2005 9:55 PMSpit out the butt of the porn industry.
Perfect.
Posted by: Willly Brand at June 8, 2005 10:34 AM