The Most Hilarious, Rootin Tootin Ice Maker Anecdote

We had our first softball practice tonight. If it was any indication of the talents of my coworkers, I expect these things to be swarming with major league scouts in no time. Yes, I include myself in the scouted list. However, while all of my teammates will be watched by the honest scouts, I'll get the shady ones who are in league with the mobsters. They're only looking at me because they're trying to throw the season. It sounds absurd now, but if I'm suiting up for your local team a few months from now, bet against them.

What else? Our ice machine has been on the fritz for a few weeks now. If there's one thing I won't accept, it's a month of lukewarm beverages. So, today we had the repair man come out. As I said before, the machine has been broken for a long time. The situation has been so hopeless, I don't even check to see if the machine is producing anything. The fact that the ice maker bar is down is just an absurd, pathetic joke between me and my appliance.

The repairman comes to the house, I let him in, and I point him towards the malfunctioning unit. He asks me, "It's not making ice, right?" And before I can even answer, he opens the freezer door and is greeted with copious amounts of just-made ice. We were both a little weirded out at that point; both cases were understandable. In my case, I expected the thing to be broken. In his case, some deranged individual called him up, complained about a busted, no-producing ice maker, and forced him to come out to the deranged individual's lair only for him to discover that everything that worked just fine. I called him out to my house on account of a busted, no-producing ice maker that clearly had no problems at all. His look read, "This guy is about to murder me or imprison me in a giant bug jar in his basement. I'm betting bug jar." And I felt a little creepy too, although all I wanted was a cold beverage. From now on, I use ice trays.