Sorry for the lack of posting lately, I've been busy. My grandmother passed away after a painful bout with cancer, which was difficult to deal with, and then there's been wedding business and all of this other stuff. Know this: I'm here, you're here, and we're both staring at a big old bowl of Goulash.
I like to get out and stretch my legs a little bit at lunch every day. Today, I decided to walk down the street to Quizno's for lunch, which is maybe a 20 minute round trip. I make it about halfway there today, when I see this little green Civic that had, crammed into it, an enormous buffalo of a man with a shaved head and a crazy long goatee. I'm walking right past this car and I peek in to see this man going absolutely insane. You know how sometimes they do a close-up of an athlete's mouth and you can just tell he's dropping f-bombs all over this place? That's what this dude was doing and, as an slightly bystander, I was enjoying the hell out of it.
Right as I'm maybe six feet away from the driver side door, he bursts out of his car. Did he, in any way, censor the incredible series of f words, mf's, and effing mf effer butts coming out of his mouth? Oh no; it was an incredible committment to loud profanity.
Even more interesting is that, during this torrent of swear words, he starts slamming his car door, opening it back up, and slamming it again, as hard as possible. His pants are covered in rips and about to fall off. Let me tell you this: it was pretty tough to ignore the giganic, nearly nude dude having the violent mental collapse in the parking lot. At the same time, I was the only other person in the parking lot and I really did not want to draw his ire. I was fully in my "keep head down, make notes for later" mode.
I thought I was going to make it safely through all of this as an observer when I hear his footsteps quicken. For just a second, I imagined him running up to me with a brick or a Wiimote and chunking it at my head. I was scared enough to actually take a running start across the parking lot. Thankfully, he was screaming and sprinting towards the drycleaners in the strip mall.
If anybody has that security camera footage, I would absolutely love to see him. Assuming he really did go into the drycleaners, I am just going to guess that I missed the most terrifying argument ever over somebody accidentally putting a crease into a pair of jeans.
Posted by Cody at August 25, 2008 9:05 PM