Round 1
First Pick: Sasquatch. As long as you get points for Yukon Destruction in your league, you can't go wrong with Sasquatch. He's a figurative and literal beast.
Second Pick: Santa Claus. Yes, he's 900 years old. Stats from last year were amazing, though: 3 billion toys delivered, 2.5 million tons of skim milk consumed, and 8 tiny reindeer. Be warned that he tends to take it easy after December 25.
Third Pick: Bilbo Baggins. Yes, he is tiny. Yes, he is likely to take a play off here and there in order to break into song. Where else do you get ringbearer points, though?
Yoda: Due for a breakout year after all of that Phantom Menace bullcrap. All bets are off if Hayden Christiansen is a waiver-wire pickup for Team Jedi, however.
Jean-Luc Picard: get him into the open field and get ready for some diplomacy. Yes, Riker gets some of his touches these days, but there's only one Cap'n.
Odin: Probably the year's dark horse. In a lot of leagues, he may even last into the seventh round. However, if you're looking to run up the score in fury, prophecy, and poetry, treat yourself to a shot of the Old Norseman.
The Terminator: Yes, the T1000 is on the draft board. Yes, that guy can turn himself into a big knife. Have we learned nothing about shape-shifters, though? Total injury concern. Take the enormous, steel android who is a guaranteed winner in sequel points. "I'll be baaaaaaaaack." You said it, dude.
Merlin: Oh, you've already got a Grand Wizard of Camelot? Not bloody likely. Valuable bowl-haircut points.
The Cowardly Lion: Yes, by definition, he is a coward. Half of his games are against munchkins, however.
Marty McFly: The new kid on the block. Look for contributions in the following areas: vests worn, Chuck Barry covers, DELOREANS (capitals for emphasis), covert Calvin Klein ads. A future version of himself may end up murdering Marty, but until that happens, stomp that gas pedal up to 88.
Posted by Cody at September 4, 2008 7:12 PM