My Version of a Political Debate

Lines are being drawn in our neighborhood right now, and if folks aren't careful, someone's going to get a bullet through their voter registration card. Until this evening, I had no idea about any of this. Then, while I was out walking the dog tonight, a neighbor shared the news: someone's been stealing the Obama signs in our neighborhood and lighting them on fire.

First of all, this is a confusing political statement. Is the thief saying he hates Democrats or that he loves warmth? Maybe he hates both democrats and warmth, but he loves the smell of burning plastic.

It's so disorganized, I suspect a conspiracy. I assert that this very well could be Obama himself lighting the signs on fire, in the hopes that people will blame it on McCain hooligans and we'll start some sort of grassroots movement here in Northwest Austin that results in the disbanding of the Republican party. Yes, it sounds like a tall order, but then my neighbor is reallllly pissed about this whole thing.

Laura actually got an Obama sign for our yard so we're right in the middle of this thing. Neighborhood, I vow to protect this sign, at least during the daylight hours when I'm at home and the blinds are pulled up. I am not a political creature by nature, but I'm a home owner and I reserve the right to use my yard to support whatever lunatic candidate I want. You steal Obama, I put up Kucinich. You steal Kucinich, I call Ron Paul, ask him who's a little too far out there, and get a sign advertising that dude. You steal that, I find a candidate on the internet whose sole platform is to ban sex crimes performed by extraterrestrials, and then he comes and stages a rally in my driveway.

This is American politics, baby.